My New Year's Resolutions

First of all, I was in great naughty form on my first New Year's Eve! See, I got a lot of cool toys for Christmas, and one of my favorites was a stuffed red pepper that my grandmother sent me. I've been playing with it so much that today my mom noticed that I've already ripped it open in several spots! I'm just practicing for when I finally get that mouse Pepé in my clutches!


Also, I love to sit around and get treats when my parents eat their people food. If they don't deliver the treats fast enough, sometimes I try to swat them out of their hands. Tonight, though, my mom was eating cheese and crackers, and she didn't look like she was going to share so I just reached into the cracker sleeve, grabbed a cracker out of the plastic and ran off into the corner with it and ate the whole thing! Food tastes so much better when it's stolen!


Later on I came back for some cheese.



Oh yeah, and I have three resolutions for 2006:

1) More biting!
2) I will eat more yummy people food!
3) I will beat up my sister less...maybe.

Have a happy New Year everyone! And don't forget to do lots of biting!

I'm a prankster!

Mommy and Daddy have a ritual in the mornings where they get up and have coffee in the office. If I'm persistent enough, they let me come into the office and hang out with them for a while. Usually I get kicked out after about 20 minutes because I've jumped into one of the plants or I've knocked over a huge stack of empty boxes...you know, the usual.

This morning after Mom left to go to work, I stole one of the aluminum knobs off of Daddy's table that he uses to make guitar pedals and batted it around the floor until I lost it. So I jumped up onto the table and started playing with another one. Daddy didn't like it, but he didn't take away my knob either. I wanted him to pay attention to me, and I noticed that his cup of coffee was next to me. I thought for a bit, and then I wondered what would happen if I picked up the knob with my mouth and held it over the cup. Would Daddy notice? Well, he didn't, so I went ahead and dropped the knob right into his coffee! Daddy sure noticed that!! He started yelling at me and then he picked me up and kicked me out of the office! When he picked me up, I started purring because I was really happy with my little joke. I need to do stuff like that more often!

A picture of me while I'm in the middle of an attack of the "crazies".

Parents Suck, and I HATE water!!

Earlier my Dad picked me up and said something about how filthy I was because I like to play in the trash and get into all kinds of stuff around the house. He then said that it was time to do something about it. I didn't like the sound of that at all, especially when I saw my mom cleaning out the sink!

Then my dad held me down in the sink while my mom squirted me with lots and lots of water. I meowed and yowled, especially when she started putting this soapy stuff on me and lathering me up. I tried to bite my daddy, but he had such a firm grip on me, I couldn't get to his hand. My big sister ran into the kitchen to see what all the fuss was about, but she just stared at me with those big green eyes of hers. I bet she was glad that it wasn't happening to her!

When they were done, they wrapped me up in a big towel. I was so traumatized at this point that I just laid on mom's lap while she rubbed me with the towel. I finally escaped and jumped out of her lap and started shaking my legs around trying to get more water off, and then it was time for a lot of licking.

Christmas trees are fun!

Number of days the tree has been decorated: 5

Number of ornaments I've batted off the tree: 10



Number of ornaments I've broken: 1

"What do you mean when you say the ornaments aren't toys?!"

I'm going to bite bite bite Doug!

Daddy has a friend named Doug that's been staying with us. I liked Doug at first. I mean, I've been sleeping next to him, sitting on his lap, and biting him. But then I found out that he said something mean about me!

Everyone says I have crazy eyes because they're just a little bit cross eyed. Well, Doug said that I looked like I had Charles Manson eyes. I don't have the eyes of a murderer!! (Well, maybe if I get my paws on that mouse Pepé who lives under the sink in the office!) I mean, really! Look at these pictures of my face and then look at Charles Manson's face at the end. Do I look like I have the face of a crazy killer?!






Oh, and the other day my parents brought home this big huge green bushy thing and put it up in the tea room. I immediately had to run over and investigate! Mom said it had something to do with a holiday called Christmas. Apparently later on there will be lots of presents under the tree that I'll get to claw and bite!
The next day my mom started hanging up round sparkly things on it and she got very angry whenever I tried to swat them off the tree. She even yelled at me when I grabbed a bunch of these wire hook thingys in my mouth and ran off with them! I just don't understand.

Jojo-isms

This morning I had a serious bite session going on. I was getting into everything and finding the best stuff to bite. After about 40 minutes, it was time to rest. Why? Because...


"To bite or not to bite, that is the question." (In case you were wondering, the answer is always "Bite")

"Biting is dead"

"Everything's been bitten"

"Biting will repeat itself"

And, after I made myself comfy I declared:

"Get comfy or die trying"




More Jojo-isms

"When life gives you teeth, then bite."

"One bite at a time"

"If at first you don't succeed, bite, bite again"

"When the biting gets tough, the tough get biting"

"I bit it my way"